Some days, like today, I get overwhelmed by what “grace” really means.
Like any other human being, I am a sinner. Don’t you hate saying that out loud? ‘I’m a sinner.’
Don’t you hate admitting bad things about yourself? Don’t you hate knowing that you do things that God deliberately asks you not to do?
I struggle with this. I can’t help but think of Romans 7 (I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.)
Sometimes I get all caught up in what I’m doing right, that I forget what I’m doing wrong. Doesn’t that sound selfish? And it would be stupid of me to say that the good outweighs the bad.
As bad as I hate to admit, I get caught up in pleasing other people. Being well-liked by other people if it means ‘sinning’ is straight out denying Christ. I’m not sugar-coating it. No one likes to hear that they deny Christ.
Don’t misunderstand me, I’m not this psycho-terrible person (I hope 🙂 ). But I think about every time I gossip, think badly about people, etc. etc….I shouldn’t sweep it under the rug.
I want to be an honest, open, trustworthy person. I think a step towards becoming more like that is to address the uncomfortable things, and try to change it. I will never live a perfect life, and I don’t want to try to be “perfect.” I want to be real, even if it means calling myself out.
To put it simply, I want to be more like Jesus.
But what does that really mean? What does it mean to be like Jesus?
I think this makes the start of a blog challenge for me. I’m going to, in an honest, non-Biblical-scholar way, try to examine what being like Jesus looks like for a college girl. I hope this helps me grow, keeps me accountable, and gives anyone who reads this blog some encouragement.
To anyone who reads this and is just “not up on the whole ‘Jesus’ thing”, maybe this can help explain why I believe the way I believe.
I want some feedback, too: agree, disagree, anything.
Back to the grace thing–is spite of all my shortcomings, I am forgiven.